Life after the letter.

So here I am, a week and some change after turning in my resignation. I'm not sure what I was expecting but what I CAN say is that I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from me.

The blog and the announcement was sort of a shock to some. Mostly coworkers. A lot of folks just weren't surprised. Of course, the rumor mill spread. A few people (i.e. those who never read my last blog) assumed the pressure and stress of the job is running me away. Nope.. I could handle the job just fine.. if my heart was still in it.

Anyway, ever since I got the email saying my resignation has been accepted I have found myself a bit lighter on my feet as I stroll the hallways of my job. It's easier for me to deal with parts of the job that I was having a hard time dealing with before. I'm able to speak my mind easier. I can say things to my supervisors that I was too intimidated to say before. I find myself wondering: "Where was all of this energy and confidence before?"

Now that I'm making my exit, I guess I feel like it doesn't matter what I say at this point. Respectfully, of course. I would never intentionally disrespect anyone, but the fear of saying the wrong thing is gone because hell, what does it matter now? I'm on the way out! In the meantime, it's business as usual. Counting down to 16 December 2016!

In other news, I still don't have a solid plan, and I'm afraid of that as well. Sidney, of course, is very optimistic about everything. No matter what direction we decide to go in, we'll be alright. Worst-case scenario, it doesn't work out and I have to go back to work! We're just taking it a day at a time. We have a couple of things in the works and we are getting the ball rolling. For right now, I'm just looking forward to spending Christmas and New Years on the West Coast.

Blue skies and high desert.

Sidney Jr.'s first birthday is coming up as well. Personally, I'm not big on the idea of a grand extravaganza for a 1-year-old. I'm not sure if I'm even going to have a party. The only thing I'm excited about is the smash cake! I was talking to Sr. not too long ago and was thinking maybe we should invite some people over just to watch what he does with it and call it a day. I never saw myself making too big of an effort for my child's birthday.. at least not until his 5th birthday, at the earliest. It's cool to have the pics and the memories but I just can't see myself spending the money for something that is essentially more for other people than it is for my child, not counting gifts, of course.

This will NOT be me

I've been told by several people that I should consider revamping my YouTube channel. I would love to do that but between actually recording the vids and editing I don't know when I'd have the time right now. I swear, when you're a working mom, there is literally zero time to do anything except work and mom. I'm not sure which direction I should go in anyway. Some say I should switch over to a Mommy vlog, which I think is a good idea. I have other things I'd like to use my channel to touch on as well, so I'm still deciding. I guess for now I'll use it the same way I'm using this blog: as a journal to talk about whatever's on my mind until I can figure something else out.

Moral of the story is: It's been over a week and the Earth has not shifted at all. When it comes to the act of actually turning in my resignation, I'm not sure what I have been afraid of all this time. I'm sure that when my new life settles into whatever it is that it is going to become, I'll be saying the same thing.

I'm ready!


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