The Essence of Essence..

So a couple weeks ago I purchased 4 tickets to a Trey Songz show at my alma mater, Georgia State University , that my homie Kellz put me on to. (The tickets are still on sale by the way, Atlanta. Buy your tickets here .) Everybody that I'm going with are super hyped and excited to see him. One of my friends, Brook , is tryna make sure we all bring something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue . lol.. My Twitter timeline is constantly on fire with Trey Songz comments. Whenever he puts out a new music video Twitter is ablaze with comments from girls ( and some boys ) about how panties are wet and vaginas are pulsating. Somebody's always #nowplaying Trey Songz something or other. Right now.. I apologize, but I just don't get it . Let me start off by saying that I am in NO way, shape, or form hating on Trey Songz. As you can see from what I've described in my previous paragraph, he's obviously an amazing artist. Selling out shows, selling

Today, I am tired. Tired of being the first and the last to know. Tired of breaking every single vertebrae in my back trying to be someone else's Cab Bank Counselor Journal Support System. I've run out of back to break. Tired of feeling the pain of those I love: friends & family AND everyone else. Tired of crying everyone's tears as well as my own. I'm just sick and fucking tired of living right now. Sick of exhausting myself trying to please every single person in my life only to have everyone treat me like a piece of shit anyway. Treated like the bad guy after doing good deeds my whole FUCKING life. I'm tired of feeling like anything but an awesome friend. A woman who is to be respected. Someone with a heart who wants to love and be loved. I'm tired of me bringing things onto myself. Tired of allowing myself to be a dirty carpet A stepping stool A ladder A toilet A hand to jack off with. I'm SICK. When I try to live for me I become public enemy #1. Why